Thursday, October 1, 2009

You Are Loved

I adore Josh Groban. He's definitely on The List. While driving home from bowling with several nerdy (read: awesome) people, I heard this song on the radio:

Don't give up
It's just the weight of the world
When your heart's heavy
I will lift it for you

Don't give up
Because you want to be heard
If silence keeps you
I will break it for you

Everybody wants to be understood
Well I can hear you
Everybody wants to be loved
Don't give up
Because you are loved

Don't give up
It's just the hurt that you hide
When you're lost inside
I will be there to find you

Don't give up
Because you want to burn bright
If darkness blinds you
I will shine to guide you

Everybody wants to be understood
Well I can hear you
Everybody wants to be loved
Don't give up
Because you are loved

You are loved
Don't give up
It's just the weight of the world
Don't give up
Every one is to be heard
You are loved

I totally choked up while driving. I know. Sappy. But you know, my husband has really embodied the spirit of this song on several occasions.

Throughout our conversion to the Catholic Church, our wedding plans, my multiple solo trips, our school plans, the surprise pregnancy, my hormones and the crazy depression that ensued.

Through our move, my seven months at home with Samuel, my transition to working mom, and even now during my transition to balanced working adult with child, Jeremy has held me while I cried, volunteered to watch Samuel while I go do things (like bowl and go to fraternity reunions) on my own, and made me talk (with frankness and honesty) about things that are bothering me.

When I tell him that I just don't know how to solve my unhappiness, he tells me that it is okay, and that I am never alone.

He encourages me to better myself and to do things that make me a stronger, healthier individual-- emotionally, mentally, and physically.

I know there are a lot of people who believe that I must be a total doormat, that I was one of those silly girls who wasn't "complete" without a husband, and that I have lost all of my identity.

I've been a lot of different people in the past. I have done a lot of pretending. I have worn several masks. Oh sure, on occasion there was a person I could trust-- my sister, Mary. My best friend, Sarah. But they have been rare.

In reality, Jeremy has helped me find my inner strength and has helped bring out who I really am. Granted, I was on that road when we met, but I realized that he was somebody with whom I could truly be free.

I could go on for hours (and maybe you feel like I have!), talking about the man that Jeremy is. But really, I would say that all anybody has to do is compare who I was ten years ago to who I am now... and they will see.

I am so thankful to know, even on the worst of days, even when we're unhappy about a situation or an action, that I am loved as ME.