Friday, April 24, 2009

7 Quick Takes Friday # 8

Weekly Seven Quick Takes are hosted by Jenn at www.conversiondiary.com

1. Our good friend Charlotte finally had her first baby. She and her husband were so anxious to meet their little Bobby! However, there have been great difficulties with his heart. He was born on Monday morning... and Charlotte wasn't able to hold him until TODAY! Charlotte and Rob are staying at the Ronald McDonald House near Duke. Bobby's scheduled for surgery on April 27 at 10:00. Please join us in prayer for this precious, sweet family.

2. Jeremy is going to Lynchburg EARLY tomorrow morning so that he can take the Praxis II for Physics. I am going along... mostly as moral support AND to meet up with my friend Meghan's family for breakfast. I look forward to it very much!

3. Samuel is growing by leaps and bounds! Every couple of days he takes a longer nap (hallelujah!). He babbles and coos constantly. Several times today, I saw aaaaaalllllmosssst turn over while playing in the floor. We also attempted rice cereal today, for the second time. Every time I filled the spoon, Samuel grabbed it, shoved it into his mouth, and sluuuuurped it clean!

4. I'm attempting some pulled pork barbeque in the crockpot tonight-- with my very own homemade peach barbeque sauce. We'll see.

5. We're going to Blacksburg next weekend because... Jeremy has a job interview with the Governor's School. Hooray! I'm actually having a difficult time praying about this. I know that it would be best for our finances, etc. if Jeremy gets a good job and we stay in this area. Buuuuuttttttt.... my best friends are still in the Blacksburg area. And I loved my parish there. I feel so selfish and silly praying to move back. Ugh.

6. We just watched a movie called Without A Clue starring Michael Caine (whom I adore). SO entertaining! It's a retelling of the Sherlock Holmes adventures, but the twist is fabulous and hilarious.

7. My weeks have started to have an actual rhythm, which is nice. Monday and Wednesday are mostly stay home and take care of things days. Tuesday and Thursday are go to daily Mass, eat lunch, and push strollers around with Katie days. Fridays are wild cards. Tuesday is also go to choir practice day... hopefully.

YAY WEEKEND!

Monday, April 20, 2009

Play-N-Pretend

I went and checked out the daycare center that people have recommended to us most highly.

The director was very nice. I waited in her office while she got her list that indicated the next availability in their nursery. While I sat and waited, I listened. Every time I heard crying, I choked. Finally managed to get myself under control before the director came in. We start talking logistics.

The next opening is in July. It's $120 a week. No, we don't offer part-time care for infants. There's a $120 non-refundable registration fee to hold your spot. It's okay, don't worry-- lots of first-time mothers cry in my office. Here, have a tissue.

Yes. I broke down and bawled in the office.

We toured the place. It seemed nice enough. Each baby has his own designated crib. They can't use cloth diapers. They keep written track of naps, meals, and play. They have a mini-mini-van stroller thingy that they use to take the kids outside and walk around. The diaper changing station looked clean and organized, and there plenty of anti-bacterial wipes nearby. It was clean looking. There were toys, swings, Exer-Saucers, and rocking chairs.

One baby was napping in a swing. One was being fed a bottle. One was playing in her crib. Three were sitting at the table having a snack. One was playing with an empty rocking chair. Two were playing in the floor. And one sweet curly-haired boy kept going to the window and calling for his mommy. I just wanted to scoop him up and hug him... and cry, of course. But I didn't.

None of the babies looked as though they had been left to wail for long periods of time unattended, which was comforting. I know. I probably sound like a nut case. I keep thinking about walking down the hall at the hospital and looking in the nursery window... seeing babies crying their heads off, while they lay under the bili-lamps.

All in all, it was a productive trip. We're going to get Samuel on the list, and wait, and pray. Mostly praying that the non-refundable money goes to waste because Jeremy ends up with a job that honestly pays enough that we don't need the spot. But also praying that I will accept with grace what God bestows upon us.

Pray with me?

Sunday, April 19, 2009

self pity and whining

Warning: as the title indicates, this post is full of whining.

There was a line I heard in a movie once. "Everybody's peeing on my head and telling me it's rain."

This is how I've been feeling for a while now. Things were going great. I was in a job I loved with bosses that I respected and co-workers that I adored. I met the man of my dreams and we got married. Then, we decided that we should both finish our college degrees. Granted, that would mean spending some time apart... but we thought that would be easier to do while we didn't have children. Once I got over the initial worries, I got very excited about this plan. It was going to be my last hurrah. Once we were both graduated, Jeremy would get a great job someplace and we would be D.I.N.K.s for a few years. THEN... we could have all the babies we ever wanted!

What a great plan!

Then I was pregnant. Wait... what?

So, I changed jobs and took a few classes online. Then Jeremy decides he wants to halt the PhD and get a job. So, we move. We buy a wonderful little house. He becomes a high school teacher. I transferred within the company. All the while, I'm totally depressed.

I have Samuel. I quit my job to stay home with him. Depression is over. I love life! Maybe when Samuel's old enough for school, I can find a job I really like or OPEN MY BAKERY and fulfill some dreams.

What a great plan!

Then the economy plummets. Wait... what?

The school tells Jeremy that they have to give his job to a more senior faculty member. He starts looking for new jobs. We start talking about putting Samuel in DAYCARE while I work full-time. Where can I work? Well... the bank that I worked for previously isn't hiring right now. Jeremy keeps mentioning nursing home and hospital "chef" jobs. I don't want to go back to a foodservice job, with it's physical exhaustion, crazy hours, ridiculous drama, and stress.

Every time Jeremy and I talk about it, I start crying. All I can do is imagine the worst. I think about somebody else being there when Samuel does really cute things that I would take a picture of. Of somebody else hearing his first words. Somebody else playing with him all day. Somebody else helping him take his first steps. I know I'm painting the bleakest picture possible... but I don't know what else to imagine. I know people do it all the time. I know. But seriously, now that I'm used to being with Samuel 24/7... I don't know if I can handle giving him over to somebody else!

I'm also scared to death that I'll be "too tired" to give him enough attention when I get home.
I think this might really be the biggest part of my worries. I mean, come on! If Samuel gets up at 7, I have to work 8-6, and he goes to bed at 9... oh my God! 3.5 hours with my son. That's it?!?!!?!?!?

I know that it's hard and frustrating for Jeremy, and that he's stressed out trying to "hedge our bets" by looking for new jobs and finishing licensure stuff. It's stressful for both of us, being in limbo right now.

I'm also frustrated by the fact that everytime I'm happy, something happens. And then, I start feeling like, "Everybody's peeing on my head and telling me it's rain."

End whininess.

Friday, April 17, 2009

7 Quick Takes Friday (#7)


1. We have an elderly neighbor who likes to come over randomly and talk to Jeremy about, well, random things. About our grass and how tall it's getting. About Jeremy's old cars. About our son. About the history of the Bible. I wouldn't mind all this, but for a single factor. He pushes the bell 3-4 times. I mean, come on! My baby could be taking one of his precious 30-45 minute naps.

I almost said something to him about all of this... but he offered to weed-eat our yard.

2. This is Spring Break week for Jeremy. The original plan was to replace the kitchen countertops this week. Instead, Jeremy is filling out applications and sending out resumes. One's going to a Cape Fear Community College in Wilmington, NC. That sounds nice to me... but it's going to have to pay an awful lot for us to take it. We shall see.

3. Samuel is very nearly sleeping through the night. It's usually 9-5 and then 5:30-7ish. Not complaining AT ALL, since for several weeks he was up 3-4 times a night.

That said... I feel that Samuel has suddenly gotten very "needy" in the past few days. Maybe because Daddy's on vacation and available to hold him too? All I know is... this cannot continue. Crying and general unhappiness I can handle. That awful squealy screeching sound he makes every time I lay him down to play in the floor? Not so much!

4. The parents are auditioning for a new pastoral position in Alabama. I hope they get it.

5. The Mary Kay sales are doing okay. I've decided that I don't want to attend the "success" meeting (aka Hey-- you should recruit everybody you know!) or participate in the conference calls (aka Hey-- you should order thousands of dollars of inventory, even though you don't know anybody in this town yet!). I like the product, and I like the Skincare Class set-up. Pretty sure I can make it without that "support."

6. My goal for Lent was to get things rolling for a mothers' group at church. I didn't get quite that far. However, the pastor's assistant's wife and I have decided that we are going to attend Daily Mass, eat lunch after, and take the babies on a walk as frequently as possible. I feel like that's a decent start.

7. This was my third Catholic Easter-- the first in our new parish. Is it really immature of me to say that I really missed our old parish and wish we could celebrate Easter there? I think the reason is two-fold. That's the parish that we did all our confirmation stuff with and where we were married. We have people there. The old parish also did things a little differently. I know that each parish varies some, and it's something I need to accept.

Either way. I love Easter.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Drinking the Kool Aid...

So... I tell my husband a lot of funny stories about my years at Bob Jones University. He usually makes some snarky comment about Kool Aid.

I'll admit, I had a hard time following all the rules. Especially ones about dusting my dresser top or having my bed made up by 7:15 every morning. I didn't like getting up at the bell at 6:55 or having a "lights out" bell at 11:00 every night. I couldn't wear pants in public (there were a few exceptions), and we couldn't go off campus in "mixed" groups. I hated pantyhose. After my time there, I still feel like any skirt that doesn't totally cover my knees (walking, sitting, or standing) is too short, and I spend all my time trying to pull it down.

Today, I got the BJU Review (the quarterly "look how awesome we are" magazine) in the mail. I usually smirk at the perfect smiling faces on the cover as I toss it into the garbage. Today, I stopped and flipped through it. Here are some things I found:

A trumpet player who started attending BJU just before I graduated will be performing with the International Honors Wind Symphony at Avery Fisher Hall in May.

BJU has received a patent for the networked cashless vending machine system developed by 3 teachers. I always thought that this was pretty nifty-- you can just swipe your student ID at the vending machine!

The Debate program is still kicking a lot of butt.

The Culinary Arts program has a new faculty member that I wish I could have studied under. He and his partner opened this bakery in New Jersey.

The science and computer science departments are sending teams across the country to help smaller Christian schools develop their ciriculum and to teach students robotics, etc.

There was a lot of other stuff, but these were the things that stuck out the most to me. It was one of those times that I was proud to claim that I've drunk from the same Kool Aid.

Just in case, I would like to apologize to any that are offended by my references to the Jonestown tragedies.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Best Weekend in Ages

On Friday, my good friend Paul came to visit with me all afternoon. We went to the bagel shoppe (the greatest saving grace of this town), drove around, and went to the local Goodwill (where I made the bargain purchase of the century, but had to leave it behind for the afternoon because Paul's brand new Mazda was too small). We sat around and chatted and laughed before he had to go to Greensboro to pick his sister up from the airport.

I can't express how thankful I am that he was willing to take the time out of his busy vacation to come see me. He just finished up AF Tech School, and is driving to Las Vegas as I write this. I probably won't see him again for years.

My darling Sigma Alpha Iota sister, "Captain" Anna Morgan showed up around 5:30. She followed me to the Goodwill where I picked up my purchase from earlier in the day-- a 3 piece dinette with an L-shaped bench, table, and additional bench all for $60. I was so thrilled about this purchase!! With the help of the excellent employees, we loaded the almost-too-large set into the back of my pick-up truck. I did a little fancy roping to secure things and we were on our way! Upon arriving home, we discovered something. The L-bench was TOO BIG for my kitchen. In all my excitement, it had not crossed my mind that this item might not fit! We twisted it and turned it, trying everything imaginable. Alas, at some point it's going to have to go somewhere else. Maybe I can save it for 20 years from now, when we might be able to convert our garage into a real dining room... or something. In the 5ish years that I've known Anna, she's been with me through thick and thin. When stupid things were done, we had one another's backs. We were car trip buddies, band buddies, and secret sisters :)

Around 7:30, my old friend Graci and her husband showed up. As far as my Army Brat upbringing is concerned... Graci and I go waaaaaaay back. Like, all the way to junior high. Seeing as how I was 13 then, and I'll be 26 in July, that's half my life! A long time for me to know somebody. We were roommates during the 2001-2002 schoolyear at good ol' Bob Jones University... the year of the blue jeans! We saw each other through good, bad, and hysterical times. 4 years later, we went to an old friend's wedding together in Elko, Nevada-- I made the wedding cake. I'll tell that story in another post. We talked and planned our own weddings on the drive to Salt Lake City... a three hour drive with wide flat lanes, 80mph speed limits, and a million exits with NO SERVICES. I don't think we were ever so thankful for a McDonald's in all our lives! A year later, I was in Georgia making Graci's wedding cake. 2 years later, Graci drove from Georgia to attend my wedding. Now, 13 years from the beginnnig of our journey together, Graci and her husband are preparing to join the US Army. Again, who knows when we will be able to see one another after this? I feel blessed that she stopped here on her way to Pennsylvania!

It was also the night of the big Battlestar Galactica finale. I don't care what anybody else has to say about it. It's one of the best shows I've ever watched in my life. And I've never loved a female actress the way I love Katee Sackhoff. The finale was 2 hours long, which provided time for all my speculating-- one of my favorite activities :) It managed to tie up some loose ends, but not too many. There were a few "happily every afters." There were some really sad scenes. And most importantly, there were mysteries left.

The ladies and I stayed up entirely too late, just catching up, sharing some gossip, and laughing a lot. It was a great night.

After everybody left on Saturday, I took a nap. God knows I needed one! Then, Samuel and I loaded up the stroller and went for a nice walk, followed by a great Mass. That night... Samuel screamed his head off and refused to sleep until 10:30. This doens't sound late to most people, but since we like to be in bed between 9 and 9:30, it was cramping our style. We have come to the conclusion that Samuel must truly be starting the teething process.

Awesome.

After waking me so many times that Jeremy offered to take a turn, I wound up sleeping on the recliner in the living room with Samuel at about 4:30. When Samuel decided that he was officially ready to be up and about at 9:00 (too early for me, all things considered!), Jeremy was gracious and took Samuel till 12:30 and let me get some much-needed sleep. While I slept, Jeremy entertained Samuel, went to the store, cleaned out the fridge, and started a pizza in the oven. Now he's at the school, trying to get some work done so that we can actually see each other this week.

I'm in a better mood than I have been on a Sunday in weeks. I feel quite blessed :)

Friday, March 13, 2009

7 Quick Takes Friday (#6)


1. I'm a little sad that 6 of my 11 posts are Quick Takes... but I guess that's better than nothing.

2. Samwise and I are still having a time of it with naps. People keep trying to encourage me and tell me it will get better... but I think it may just be some great mirage in the desert of my life :) He's also been a little off with his night sleep-- he woke up three times last night! What is that all about?!?!?!

3. My mother bought us a dozen Fuzzi Bunz for Samwise's 100th Day birthday. I love them! Granted, these are the first cloth diapers I've ever used... but the convenience and cost efficiency is not lost on me. His butt looks huge in them-- and it's adorable!

4. Yesterday, I went on a walk with my priest's assistant's wife. We're about the same age, and she just had twins a month ago. Let me tell you... hanging out with her makes me feel like my life is a total cake walk. Seriously. Getting the twins ready for a walk was way more complicated than getting Samuel ready for anything. More importantly, I just feel blessed to have another woman that's in the same age range and life-cycle stage as me. I never thought I would long for female company so badly!

5. Also, yesterday I signed up to be a Mary Kay consultant. I'm really excited! My hope is that I'll be able to bring home enough to avoid having to get an additional part-time (or full time), out of home job. I know that's going to take a lot of discipline on my part. It's also going to require me to step out of my comfort zone and start going up to people. One of the great things (I hope!) will be the weekly success meetings.

6. The school where Jeremy works is having a spring plant sale, and he's going to grab some calla lilies for me. I'm so excited because they're my favorite, and it was all his idea! My intention is to pot them in pretty pots and put them outside, and then bring them in when it gets cold... no point in wasting money and plants!

7. I keep finding half-empty cups of coffee around the house (left over from interruptions by Samwise).... I just wish I could find them before I run the dishwasher. Oh well.

Happy Friday!!